January 15, 2014
Thus far, we have examined five personality traits that characterize the sexually attractive Asian man: being a leader, assertive, adventurous, easygoing, and sexual. In many respects, all these traits lead back to one over-riding trait: Independence. The journey to becoming a sexually empowered man requires developing a quality of independence that is not always encouraged in Asian society.
Independence is the last piece of the puzzle, a piece that you must have in order to activate the other traits. You simply can’t be assertive, you can’t be a leader, you can’t be sexual, and you would find it incredibly difficult to become adventurousness or easy going if you are not independent.
Confidence with Women
Independence starts with accepting yourself as you are and recognizing that you don’t have to please everyone else. It means being strong and confident, physically and emotionally, but also having the strength to show vulnerability and experience your emotions. It means staying independent even within the confines of a relationship.
How to be Attractive to Women
The first step to developing independence is to accept yourself. You need to give yourself acceptance before you can make any other changes that last. You need mentally and emotionally to acknowledge that you are the way you are – including your strengths but also your weaknesses, flaws, and imperfections – and only then can you make any permanent progress.
I know this might sound paradoxical. The idea is that you must acknowledge the way you currently are but that you’d like to strive for even more. Before you can effect any lasting change, you have to accept your starting point. Regardless of how bad the state is in which you currently find yourself, it is still where you currently find yourself.
You have to accept that this is your starting point before you can push forward. You must accept yourself before you can be strong and be accepted by others.
As adult children Asian’s cannot expect continuous accolades from mom and dad. Your parents aren’t going to praise you for every accomplishment or give you hugs every time they see you. It just doesn’t work that way. Instead, you need to give that positive reinforcement to yourself, know in your own eyes that you did well and let that be enough.
You are the person that you want to please.
How to Attract Girls
Let’s look at that idea, that to develop independence you need to please yourself. This starts by rewarding yourself and treating yourself. There are a lot of ways to treat yourself. If you have lived very frugally your entire life, treat yourself by spending a little money on something you have always wanted. Maybe you have wanted to get in shape, create a nice six pack, but you didn’t want to pay for a gym membership… just do it. Think about all the things you have done to please others. Now, put some of that same energy towards pleasing yourself for a bit. It is important to point out that this is not all about enjoying yourself in the short term; it can be about developing discipline and getting yourself healthier so you look and feel better; taking care of yourself is also part of treating yourself.
Treating yourself means taking care of your body. Getting exercise is one way that you do that – when you exercise you win in three ways. When you get yourself to the gym regularly you get the reward of knowing that you are doing something for yourself, and no one else. This tells your unconscious that you are worthy of good things.
Also, you get to feel healthy and fit and live longer. Finally, you create a body that women want. These three things have to be enough to make up for the membership fee and the time you spend working out. So, make the time in your schedule, force yourself to be disciplined and get to the gym.
You may be surprised to read this, but you probably also need to sleep more. Too many Asian males work 50, 60, 70 or even 80 hours a week, all in an effort to get the approval of others, whether it is your boss or your parents. Many men do this for so many years that eventually they just break down. Prevent this by pulling back just a bit, cut your hours to something more reasonable.
Most importantly, make sure that you are getting enough sleep. Actually, any type of relaxation would probably make you feel better, so be sure you relax, read a book, treat yourself to a massage, or take a vacation.
Do what works for you; identify the things that you have dreamed about but have never done, things you have been putting off, and do them. Whether it is teeth whitening or guitar lessons, just get out there and live the life you have been thinking about.
How to Get Girls’ Attention
I can look at most of my Asian clients and just see that they do not take care of themselves. They are out of shape. They always look tired or stressed out. They wear boring, outdated clothes, have bad teeth and wear glasses. This is not treating yourself well. Take care of yourself, do things for you, so that you feel good and look your best. Then, you will begin to attract women naturally.
For the start of the Manifesto, click here.
For Part 1, of this section on Independence, click here.
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